Posts Tagged ‘life’

Inspired by Diana Owen’s blog posting[http://diane-owens.com/2012/06/16/day-152-question-152/] on this question, I’d like to take a swing at it from my p.o.v.

This strength that we are supposed to conjure up to save us from life, from daily struggles, from turbulence?

Reflecting on her question[ What was the last experience that made you a stronger person? ] has brought me to question the exact same thing. What has made me stronger?

I think to be honest, I do not think one particular experience can indeed make you stronger, it is possible that a base experience could provide the path for many other experiences to take form  into becoming something that indeed serves to keep a person stronger-sane I’d like to call it. To say that one(uno) experience actually causes this would be mere fallacy but I do believe that it could begin there, could be the starting point. Then again, I guess we all look at the world from a different point of view, so..

Back to the question: What was the last experience that made you a stronger person?

I guess for me there is only one, one that I hold on to with dear life. One that serves as that point, where I go nothing ….can be worse than this[ i will survive] Nothing at all. It serves as a great reminder to all things that occur around me[ but also serves to put a stopp.  To those who know me well, there would know that this experience would be the one in which I lost someone very close to my heart when I was 16.

Losing someone close you heart is like losing apart of yourself. Apart you possibly never knew existed, let alone was growing in you all along. When you do lose that someone, all sorts of feelings and emotions start appearing. Things you have never felt, things that normally meant nothing or could not move you to react among others. The thing about this sort of experience is that it changes you, for good? for worse? I do not know, all I know is as a result you become stronger, you become like a brick wall like the great wall of china sorta strength [really? yes really].

Now most would consider that as something negative to build up walls in that manner, but it kind of protects you, shields you. In turn it also feels you with something an amplified version of feelings be it positive or negative. It could be extreme paranoia, fear, desire, wants, needs, happiness among others. It is something hard to really tell what indeed is going on in a person’s mind to actually get to where she or he is.

But the answer to this question is like a double-edge sword, cause as much as it protects you, it also makes you just as vulnerable. Your experience also defines you, builds you to become who you are, sometimes for the better, sometimes for the worse.

Strength can serve you well if used correctly, but wrongly can leave scars that forever remains. So you might be stronger than you think, but are you really strong? [yes, I can be very complicated, I barely comprehend myself sometimes :)]

If you change your mind, I’m the first in line Honey

I’m still free , take a chance on me

If you need me, let me know, gonna be around

If you’ve got no place to go, if you’re feeling down

If you’re all alone when the pretty birds have flown

Honey I’m still free Take a chance on me

Gonna do my very best and it ain’t no lie

If you put me to the test, if you let me try

Take a chance. We often told numerous times in our life to just take that chance. Go out there, I mean what do you have to loose? If you have not accomplish anything yet, what’s there to loose? It applies in every facets of our lives from our careers, education and even our love life.

But the question is do we take that chance? Do you take that chance?

Taking chances, sounds easy enough. Simple enough really. You just go out there and seize the day, seize the moment, seize whatever comes your way. But is it really that simple? Is taking chances that easy? Is there no consequences in putting yourself out there?

If I say no, I’d be pulling your leg most definitely. Come on, how can there be no consequences when you put yourself out there.

It is like being naked. Being vulnerable. Putting your guard down.

Consequences will always be present. What you got to ask yourself really is if that chance is worth taking? Is it really? Are you taking that chance for yourself or because someone else wants you to?

How that chance is taken and how it will work or proceed is entirely up to you…I’m not saying that taking chances will result in having a positive outcome nor am I saying that it will guarantee happiness, money or even success.

That is the thing about taking chances. It involves a lot of risk.

It might leave you more bent out of shape that you were before. It might make you the happiest women/men alive. It might rob you off your self-confidence for a bit. It might make you see the world in a different light. It might take you on an adventure you would have never ever been open to before. It might open doors to the impossible.

The thing is that you won’t know which one of these possibilities will be your outcome.

What I can tell you is that taking a chance on something or someone is not easy, especially if you have been through a lot on your own, if you have been jaded in the past for whatever reason…it sure as hell ain’t easy and anyways saying it is ..is bullshitting you to the core.

Will you regret taking that chance, I can’t say. I’m not you nor are you me.

At times, I do wonder whether taking chances is a good idea because it can leave you freezing in the cold, gasping for air-wishing you had never crossed or walked that path. You might walk to the middle of the bridge to take that chance will the other person might leave you hanging mid-way. It isn’t entirely up to you. But what I do know is that…

…In that smallest gap of a moment, I think of all the wonderful things I did experience. while taking that path towards my chance and I feel maybe it was worth it after all. Even if it does hurt now.

I mean would you rather leave it to the universe to decide?  I wouldn’t.

ABBA  did set the record, years ago…

 

 

Why is it really like that, huh?

Sure beats me.

You know for instance when you get up from bed and hit your leg against the steel frame,only to leave you with throbbing pain for the next few minutes and somehow everything else kinda takes a similar course.

That would be the same day your car would break down, the business deal will fall through, a long awaited appointment would be canceled and the list goes on. Some say it’s sheer bad luck, people who follow the secret will say you put yourself in that path while some of us would just settle with this old proverb;
when it rains,it pours

Sucky ain’t it. So should we follow the secret? I mean I have tried it and to a certain extent, it does make a difference, I guess.

It calms you down,makes you more patient, provides you with time to re-evaluate your situation without blowing your top, among other things.

Hence, giving you that space and clear thoughts for what you intend to do,later in that day or time frame.

But it ain’t easy to practice the secret, it’s a lot of faith, lot of belief in all that can be.

What I do not get is how this often occurs to the best of people? The people who kill themselves working hard for their bosses, generous people, kind people, people who follow the rules, people who have a conscience, people who have principles,people who basically follow the rules of society!

Why does it rain and pour? Does it not pay to be good? Often it does cross my mind and then I’m reminded that.. This is what makes people like us different, beautiful in and out,stronger, more confident and basically just the way we are.

Although I might question it very now and then I do believe that god has a plan for us, a plan for us all, for those who have had to weather storms and have come out soaking, yet still willing to brave the rain each time.

Yes, he has a plan for you and for me, you just wait and see:)

For it will be glorious.. For when it does rain the next time around it will an abundance of grace.

Deuteronomy 31:6
Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you.

God bless, good night:)

And all along I believed
I would find you
Time has brought
Your heart to me
I have loved you for a
Thousand years
I’ll love you for a
Thousand more

Driving back at 2 am, hearing this song with such an intensity- reflecting on conversations I’ve had with the closes of friends in the last week or so- and still it puts me in awe. The simple fact that we believe, no matter how jaded we are that in the end, each of us will find that someone who makes us feel that way…that way.

Putting all that aside, the songs..the lyrics..the scenes that have replayed in our minds millions of times of true love, of finding someone…that completes that circle…the balance we hope to achieve when we do find that person in our lives. But are we believing on blind faith?

Is it what we truly come up with ourselves? The idea of finding that perfect someone who completes us. Is there such a person? I mean are we truly being idealistic at best?

I mean after all in the movies, in lyrics, in songs- it always works out somehow…the scene always ends with the heartbroken person, falling safely into the trusting, loving and strong hands of their rescuer, their perfect person in one way or another through the beautiful institution of marriage.

It hardly ever shows you what happens beyond that…beyond the wedding dress, the shoes, the event, the food, the glamour, the hype of it all… I mean what really happens?

You put two completely different individuals together, no matter what sort of mutual habits/likes/hobbies etc..I mean your putting two people of the opposite sex together, that itself throws you off completely. The way females and males think differ, its like being on different planets altogether (Yes,….Mars and Venus alright). But it does not end there! Then if you look further, you looking at different characters, personalities, principles..the list goes on.

How can these two people co-exist in the same bubble continuously and be able to deal with each other with all the quirks, the ups, downs across the years? Do they get tired? Can they love each other with the same intensity as they did before?

Yet people lie, cheat, beg, steal and the list continues in relationship prior and even after marriage, at times. So what keeps us still looking for that someone? Finding for that person? Having a hope that we will beat the odds, we will be triumph through it all. We will be different.

The question is how many of us have said that before, we will be different, we won’t be like them. We will survive….

What is the cost of that survival?

Losing who you are? Being someone else? Living a double life? Starting to despise the sight of a person you could not stay even a minute from before without missing….? Truly being connected with the other person? Soul mates? Does it exist? For how long?

I have no clue….

The odds are depressing..the amount of people who suffer in the pursuit of finding that right person…..

Yet we still hope, we still love and we still pursue that road that leads us to a thousand years.

Why? Why do I still believe? Why do you??